A thread about parenting

[wrylachlan]

I’m a big fan of the osmosis method. When our kids were at that stage we put stuff up ALL OVER THE HOUSE. You couldn’t walk into any room in our house without seeing numbers and letters posted up everywhere.

We also had lots of counting routines. Stairs is a good one. For like a year we counted stairs every single time we went up or down.

We also built it into everyday activities, “I need you to help set the table - there will be two adults and two children, how many forks do we need?” And any time you need to do some math for yourself, just do it out loud.
——
All that said, Kindergarten is an age where learning disabilities can raise their head. So try card games. Try some of the stuff I mentioned. Try stuff your teacher suggests. But if the child doesn’t make progress, just go ahead and get a specialist to test him. If there is a learning disability, getting them help early makes a world of difference.

 

[demultiplexer]

Gotta say we're not having any trouble with our kids' math skills, but they're also not judged on any specific math skills until ~7yo, so we don't know when those problems are going to rear their heads

 

[drogin]

Gotta say we're not having any trouble with our kids' math skills, but they're also not judged on any specific math skills until ~7yo, so we don't know when those problems are going to rear their heads

Well, for many, even if they are not dealing with limitations, there is this strange correlation at 10-12 years old between their ability to do school work and their desire to experiment with the hypothetical of: “What would life be like if I was the laziest human on the planet?”

 

[KT421]

Gotta say we're not having any trouble with our kids' math skills, but they're also not judged on any specific math skills until ~7yo, so we don't know when those problems are going to rear their heads

There are also different subskills and the evaluations used don't readily distinguish which subskill is lacking.

In our house, the kids are quite good at math. At or above grade level.

Doing math on command however....

 

[Semi On]

Early on, we made math into a series of games. For example, during the pandemic, which is when B should have been in pre-K, the three of us would take a soccer ball to the park near by. We would stand in a triangle and kick it to each other, issuing a math equation. If the ball came to you, you had to answer the equation before you could then issue your own challenge and kick the ball to someone else.

Math became associated with fun and play. At nearly 10, math is by far his favorite subject. He loves it.

Now reading...

 

[Saribro]

In our house, the kids are quite good at math. At or above grade level.
Doing math on command however....

Non-newtonian skills, as it were. The sterner the command, the higher the resistance...

 

[drogin]

Sigh. Youngest broke his arm yesterday...non-surgical, but it was a pretty bad break. Both the radius and the ulna of his dominant arm.

It didn't happen due to wrestling, but it happened while waiting for wrestling to start. He's been doing a clinic for his age group at the local High School and has been loving it, and I hope this doesn't change that.

I wasn't there, but sounds like some of the kids (including mine) when into the room but the coaches were late. To hear him tell it, when they got in there and the coaches where there they all started goofing around. Apparently one of the larger kids (not sure if older because he didn't recognize the kid and they do grades 2-4 in same clinic) grabbed him and started "spinning him around" and then let go. I guess he landed on his own arm since there isn't much in that room, and it got wrestling mats...

Anyway, we aren't looking to burn anybody, but we are requesting any video the school may have just so we can understand what happened.

 

[Coriolanus]

Helped my daughter finish her Neptune project.

There’s a tiny cardstock Bingo and Floppy flying above it.

 

[Coriolanus]

The sleep regression is recognizable but keep in mind it's temporary. It's a thing you have to go through. #2 here still definitely needs to nap so with rigorous sleep hygiene we return to a good sleep schedule every time. It's much worse at daycare, where they regularly skip sleeps, clearly because of the less rigorous oversight (which we're fine with, by the way, kids need to learn life skills and not everywhere is as structured as at home).

I feel pretty lucky that both of our kids never had a sleep regression. They both still sleep from 7/8 until 5:45 every day, ever since they were toddlers.

 

[Da Xiang]

I feel pretty lucky that both of our kids never had a sleep regression. They both still sleep from 7/8 until 5:45 every day, ever since they were toddlers.

My first born never slept more than 2 hours (!!!) per day for his first two years of life!!! My wife and I were totally over our heads trying to cope.......Some good friends had a baby a couple of weeks before us. They were constantly boasting about how their baby would go down to sleep at 7pm and sleep straight through until 10am! every night--We drifted away from that relationship.......

 

[Thegn]

La Petit Sprog continues to waste A LOT of time in the morning. She starts the morning with Daddy Huggie (I get her in a standing bear hug for 1-2 minutes, then throw her on the bed) but she often lays on the bed for 10-15 minutes before starting to move, let alone making her bed or getting dressed. The other day she actually managed to come down within 15 minutes of getting up, and then complained of being hungry and refused to do anything until she ate breakfast. Of course she eats really slowly and none of her morning chores were completed…

So, new rules
1. After daddy huggie, we do 10 jumping jacks to get the sleepies out.
2. When she comes down, she can’t bring stuffies with her. (She has one she will carry around all the time in the morning, gets in her way when she is trying to do stuff. She’s ten for chrissake!)
3. If she wants to eat breakfast before completing her morning task list, she can make it herself. If she’s getting her morning list done, I’ll make it. (Her favorite breakfast is scrambled egg with feta and seaweed)

She also does this thing where whenever we point out that she isn’t doing what she needs to do she drops to her knees and starts moaning. I’m fucking tired of it.

 

[Thorvard]

Our morning consists of:

"How many times have I told you to get up?"
"Get up, this is the third time"
"WAKE UP"

Then I go in and repeatedly flip the lights and say her name over and over again.

Thankfully our oldest is good about getting up and getting going(as he should be at 17) but still sometimes he'll just sleep through his alarm.

 

[Thegn]

With us we try something new to wake her up, it works for 2-3 days, then she’s back to not getting up, when she gets up finally it takes 30-40 minutes of reminders to get her to make her bed and get dressed, etc…

 

[Tom the Melaniephile]

We also had lots of counting routines. Stairs is a good one. For like a year we counted stairs every single time we went up or down.

We watched enough rocket launches with the spawn on my lap that they learned to count down before they learned to count up...

 

[Coriolanus]

Our morning consists of:

"How many times have I told you to get up?"
"Get up, this is the third time"
"WAKE UP"

Then I go in and repeatedly flip the lights and say her name over and over again.

Thankfully our oldest is good about getting up and getting going(as he should be at 17) but still sometimes he'll just sleep through his alarm.

Hardwired speaker that you can use to blast Phillip Glass at her. She's gonna get up to KOOOOOYAAAAAAANISQAAAAAAATASSSSSIIIIIIIIIIII... turned up to 11.

 

[drogin]

Hardwired speaker that you can use to blast Phillip Glass at her. She's gonna get up to KOOOOOYAAAAAAANISQAAAAAAATASSSSSIIIIIIIIIIII... turned up to 11.

I prefer "Gotta Get Up" by Nilsson. Catch. Topical.

 

[MeteorX]

My 15 year old is required to be downstairs by a certain time in the morning. How early she sets her alarm is up to her, but the requirement doesn't change. It took a while for this to stick but has been working for us for a few years (slooooow breakfast/chores and "I'm tired" complaints notwithstanding). She also has the alarm on the other side of the room to force her to get out of bed (which she promptly returns to until ten minutes before she has to be downstairs).
We rarely have to intervene. That being said, it took a while to get to this point. We often had to physically drag her out of bed when she was younger.

 

[Leaping Gnome]

People still make their kids make their bed? Why bother?

 

[Da Xiang]

La Petit Sprog continues to waste A LOT of time in the morning. She starts the morning with Daddy Huggie (I get her in a standing bear hug for 1-2 minutes, then throw her on the bed) but she often lays on the bed for 10-15 minutes before starting to move, let alone making her bed or getting dressed. The other day she actually managed to come down within 15 minutes of getting up, and then complained of being hungry and refused to do anything until she ate breakfast. Of course she eats really slowly and none of her morning chores were completed…

So, new rules
1. After daddy huggie, we do 10 jumping jacks to get the sleepies out.
2. When she comes down, she can’t bring stuffies with her. (She has one she will carry around all the time in the morning, gets in her way when she is trying to do stuff. She’s ten for chrissake!)
3. If she wants to eat breakfast before completing her morning task list, she can make it herself. If she’s getting her morning list done, I’ll make it. (Her favorite breakfast is scrambled egg with feta and seaweed)

She also does this thing where whenever we point out that she isn’t doing what she needs to do she drops to her knees and starts moaning. I’m fucking tired of it.

Gotta stop those moans NOW! My gf is almost 60 and as she pushes my wheelchair, she vocalizes constant sighs and moans to make sure I don't forget how hard she's working. It is really annoying. [Today we're supposed to go visit friends at their restaurant. I've already decided the wheelchair is staying home. It will be my first outing on foot. I walked a total of 1 hour split into two 30 minute sessions back and forth in our apartment and this morning, my usual soreness when I first get up wasn't present. So today's the day the wheelchair gets retired.]

 

[Bardon]

Gotta stop those moans NOW! My gf is almost 60 and as she pushes my wheelchair, she vocalizes constant sighs and moans to make sure I don't forget how hard she's working. It is really annoying. [Today we're supposed to go visit friends at their restaurant. I've already decided the wheelchair is staying home. It will be my first outing on foot. I walked a total of 1 hour split into two 30 minute sessions back and forth in our apartment and this morning, my usual soreness when I first get up wasn't present. So today's the day the wheelchair gets retired.]

Sorry about dealing with the moans, but congrats on retiring the wheelchair! That's a big step - literally!

 

[Bardon]

Our morning consists of:

"How many times have I told you to get up?"
"Get up, this is the third time"
"WAKE UP"

Then I go in and repeatedly flip the lights and say her name over and over again.

Thankfully our oldest is good about getting up and getting going(as he should be at 17) but still sometimes he'll just sleep through his alarm.

To be fair, I'm 63 this year and I sometimes do this.

 

[Da Xiang]

To be fair, I'm 63 this year and I sometimes do this.

I have never been woken up by an alarm. For many years I even had a job that started at 5am and I seldom went to bed before 1 or 2am. But even then I ALWAYS wake up five minutes before the alarm goes off. Very strange.

 

[Thorvard]

Hardwired speaker that you can use to blast Phillip Glass at her. She's gonna get up to KOOOOOYAAAAAAANISQAAAAAAATASSSSSIIIIIIIIIIII... turned up to 11.

View: https://youtu.be/RRKJiM9Njr8?si=K1wDsTWpk4zVytuO


If she doesn't get up I cast that to the Google home and it's usually followed by me busting into the room singing

 

[demultiplexer]

Man, I'm so happy both me and my kids are morning people

 

[wrylachlan]

People still make their kids make their bed? Why bother?

It’s daily training for the marshmallow test of life. Take the time in the morning to make your bed (and miss out on a minuscule amount of play time) and you’re rewarded at night when you get to slip into a well made bed.

 

[wrylachlan]

Hardwired speaker that you can use to blast Phillip Glass at her. She's gonna get up to KOOOOOYAAAAAAANISQAAAAAAATASSSSSIIIIIIIIIIII... turned up to 11.

I’m a big fan of the acid jazz section of The National Anthem from Kid A. We used to do a “weird day” at the summer camp I worked and I’d use that to wake up the camp. Neighbors fucking HATED that day.

 

[JiveTurkeyJerky]

It’s daily training for the marshmallow test of life. Take the time in the morning to make your bed (and miss out on a minuscule amount of play time) and you’re rewarded at night when you get to slip into a well made bed.

The problem there, is I could care less about "slipping into a well made bed". Literally no difference to me, zero gain or reward of any kind for it to be well made versus the stuff I need being there shabbily strewn about.

Honestly, I hate getting into a hotel bed with everything tucked and tight. Not going to yuck someones yum, but it's something that is not a universal preference.

 

[Cognac]

People still make their kids make their bed? Why bother?

Is there a particular judgement that you wish to pass on people and parents who prefer beds to be made? To each their own of course, but to me there's a few benefits.

Personally, I like my rooms to be neat and tidy. A made bed is part of that. Making the bed once I'm awake is also part of my waking up routine. As a teen I found this a helpful way to get to the "being up and about" part of the morning, basically a bunch of things to do on autopilot while I was still in the process of waking up. Hell, even now it still serves that purpose for me.

As for Little Miss Cognac: My House, My Rules. Personally, I like my rooms to be neat and tidy. A made bed is part of that. An unmade bed, however, is an easy way to hide things that should have been packed away, somewhere unwashed clothes might be hiding, and an easy indicator on whether or not rules are being followed. Now, Little Miss Cognac isn't yet old enough to be making the bed by herself, but I still do this routine with her every morning. It's a chore that takes roughly 3 seconds to complete, and one that I fully expect her to be completing every morning once she's internalised it. Like brushing teeth, bathing, or getting dressed by themselves, exposure and repetition breeds habits. And in our house we make a habit of making the bed.

 

[drogin]

Yeah, I don't really care about made beds either, but I can see the value in it being a way to set a routine.

It's a simple job that they can do daily, and gets them into that mode.

Other options of course, but I get it.

 

[Thorvard]

I have never been woken up by an alarm. For many years I even had a job that started at 5am and I seldom went to bed before 1 or 2am. But even then I ALWAYS wake up five minutes before the alarm goes off. Very strange.

Twins!

I sleep between 12-2, depending on my mood, and wake up around 530ish. I almost always seem to wake up right before my alarm goes off. My father in law sleeps at 9 and wakes up at 315 on the dot. No alarm, nothing. Just wakes up at that time and goes about his day.

Personally, I like my rooms to be neat and tidy. A made bed is part of that. Making the bed once I'm awake is also part of my waking up routine. As a teen I found this a helpful way to get to the "being up and about" part of the morning, basically a bunch of things to do on autopilot while I was still in the process of waking up. Hell, even now it still serves that purpose for me.

To me it's not different than a messy room. A clean room just looks nicer. Sure, I get it, you know where in that pile of clothes your pants are, doesn't mean I like it.

And yes, my house, my rules. When you get an apartment you can do what you please.

 

[Bardon]

I have never been woken up by an alarm. For many years I even had a job that started at 5am and I seldom went to bed before 1 or 2am. But even then I ALWAYS wake up five minutes before the alarm goes off. Very strange.

I was pretty much like that throughout my teenage years and into university, however once I joined the Navy that went out the window. Sleep was far too precious and my brain wouldn't let me waste a single second of it, especially if I had Middle Watch.

 

[Thorvard]

Welp, the boy got into every school he applied to including his top 3(Stevens, RIT, RPI) now to sit down, look at the financial offers and make a decision.

 

[zero cool]

I can’t believe how hip Troy is now - it was pretty rundown when I went to RPI like 20 years ago.

 

[curih]

I can’t believe how hip Troy is now - it was pretty rundown when I went to RPI like 20 years ago.

Interesting. Troy being a dump was one of several reasons I picked RIT over RPI about the same time.

 

[JiveTurkeyJerky]

Troy (and Schenectady, if they had considered Union), have both seen major revitalization over the last decade. Plus, the new RPI President is way more involved locally than Shirley ever was.

Though I haven't been to Rochester in about a decade, so maybe it's gotten better than the last time I was there too.

 

[curih]

Though I haven't been to Rochester in about a decade, so maybe it's gotten better than the last time I was there too.

Meh

 

[Thorvard]

Troy (and Schenectady, if they had considered Union), have both seen major revitalization over the last decade. Plus, the new RPI President is way more involved locally than Shirley ever was.

Though I haven't been to Rochester in about a decade, so maybe it's gotten better than the last time I was there too.

The guide at RPI really hyped up Troy as a cool place with lots of concerts, great restaurants etc. We just did a one day trip so we didn't get to spend a lot of time in Troy so I can't really comment on it outside of what I've heard.

 

[hanser]

Kiddo turned 8. Far cry from page 1, post 1. Anyway we've started middle-of-the-night nightmares, which has been super fun. She came into our room four times in one hour last.

In unrelated news, my brain is jello this morning.

 

[MeteorX]

In unrelated news, my brain is jello this morning.

There's always room for Jell-O!!!!!

 

[Coppercloud]

Kiddo (8) is starting to play video games on switch with a friend online. Actually it's one of my best buddy's kid and they're flippin adorable and I love it. But the problem is there's no integrated chat. I would, honestly, rather my kid just communicate on a phone like I'm used to, but I don't want to give her mine, or get her her own, so I'm looking at chat apps. I have so many thoughts. My first instinct is to go to something like signal for personal/digital privacy, but most parents aren't going to want to just hand their kids signal. Just Talk Kids and Meta's Messenger Kids have been floated by other parents because they include parental controls. Personally I'd rather just make sure she doesn't have unfettered access to the device and that I'm around when she's using it, but at the end of the day I don't get to pick the apps that all parents decide to go along with (though, in this specific case I have a little sway with kiddo's friend's dad).

So at the end of the day I'm probably going to get a Just Talk Kids account for her. I've heard it's had significant breaches, but it's that or a Meta product and well... pick your poison. But I wanted to reach out to see what everyone else thought or has been using with their kids. It's gotta work on a tablet or phone with no SIM card and just wifi, though honestly I'd prefer that if it has parental controls they can be managed on a web UI because I don't want another dedicated app on my phone like that.

Hope everyone's been doing well. Between the chaos of neurospicy children (and spouse), other commitments, and political-climate-induced depression I haven't really frequented the lounge threads and let my sub lapse for about a year. I live in MN so it's not like that whole politics permeating daily life thing is any less of a thing right now, but none-the-less I'm back!