So, here's the problem with this theory: Trump and his supporters are ultimately liars. The idea that they 'need' us to do something so that they can invoke the Insurrection Act is fallacious, after all, any such 'need' they might actually have can be sufficiently fulfilled with lies. So, the idea that us declining to do something might serve as some kind of protection is senseless, as what we don't do won't stop them from lying about it. If the supposed alternative that they would inflict on us for taking action is "far worse", well, that's because they want us to suffer under that far worse situation regardless. And, because of that, no matter how hard we attempt to appease them, they will eventually inflict it upon us. And, either way, by the time that they do, it will appear to be nothing more than the next logical step. After all, the previous step didn't make us stop existing.
Your assumption about his desires are likely correct, but our overtures to the Rule of Law are meaningless to him. The reality is that such desires are not achieved in one moment. Instead, they are advanced piecemeal, one logical step at a time. First you send the national guard to Chicago to convey the idea that Chicago is a lawless hellhole. Then, after people grow used to that, you send ICE to actively harass places like Minneapolis. Then, once that becomes normal, you escalate one step further: now ICE starts randomly beating brown people up. And, again, you wait for people to grow used to that as the current status quo. Then you have them start murdering people. In each case, it isn't some overture to the rule of law that slows this process down, instead it's the fact that the it takes time for the last such escalation to start to feel normal. And then you see the next logical step.
Which means that this kind of response "if we give them a reason, they will beat us" doesn't work. After all, that just makes the last step seem like it might be normal. Which means it is exactly the wrong response. Instead, what you want to see is people playing the rough music because that is a clear sign that the locals find what's happening utterly abnormal and unacceptable. When ICE can show up an any place in town and whoever just happens to be present will start blowing whistles, honking horns, banging pots and pans, and screaming at them, that is the evidence that something abnormal is happening, and that abnormality is what will ensure that the "next step" never seems logical. Indeed, it indicates the most recent step was not logical either. That's what brings this kind of disaster to a halt.